November 20, 2003
Little Buckaroo Visits England
"Laura, did you pack my pilot costume? We're having
dinner with the Queen of England, and I want to look hot."
"No, Dubby, you know Karl said that I couldn't let you
wear the pilot costume in public any more."
"But I look really hot. You saw how much press coverage
I got when I wore it out to the Abraham Lincoln to declare
an end to the fighting in Iraq. Some people said I looked
like a real war hero. Frankly, I think I'm going to end up
with a medal for heroism in Vietnam."
"But Dubby, you weren't in Vietnam. Papa kept you for
going, and, let's tell the truth, you were in no shape to
go to war."
"Hey, don't you bring up that cocaine thing again. Lots
of my war buddies in Vietnam were on cocaine. It was
like 'our thing.'"
"George, you did NOT go to Vietnam. You didn't have
a Vietnam 'our thing' except for that one really scary
weekend when you were hallucinating so bad. Now just
get into your white-tie outfit so we can go to dinner.
And remember, wear the lace-up shoes, not the
"Awright! Crap, what's the fun of being president if I
can't dress up really cool and show up the Queen of
England. Hey, why isn't the King going to be there?"